Why is no one talking about leadership grief?
Leadership grief hides behind growth. Here’s what it is, why leaders don’t name it, and how to lead through loss.
You are never authentic!
This could also be titled Everybody lies all the time or What everyone ought to know about honesty and authenticity.
You Are Never Authentic
Let’s stop pretending.
Let’s stop pretending that we’re honest.
Let’s stop pretending that authenticity is some kind of virtue badge.
The reality?
We lie.
A lot.
And we’ve been trained to do so since birth. Some of the earliest “truths” we’re fed Father Christmas, the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny are lies we collectively agree to keep telling. It's cultural, it’s comfortable, and it’s how we learn to lie with a smile.
So let’s cut through the fluff. The dystopian aspect of society is we are literally told, brought up and live in a lie. From conception to birth to living our lives mostly based on lies.
Be Curious, Not Furious
The Default Reaction
We’ve all done it.
Reacted. Snapped. Got furious before we got curious.
I’ve done it with Dave. In the middle of life and noise and deadlines, I've chosen fury over pause.
And in those moments, the real story, the human underneath the mistake, gets missed.
The intention , often good, kind, loving, never sees the light of day.
And the reality, most of the time it’s not even about the other person It’s internal.
That’s the root of all of this.
We don’t need to fix others first. We need to work on what’s going on inside us.
And there it is.
“I’m Fine”, the biggest red flag?
I’m fine. Red flag when you say. Especially when you believe it yourself.
“I’m fine.” We all say it .
Its disposable. It’s a throwaway, its innate in most of us, yet it’s a programmed prompt we have used for years maybe. It seems harmless. Innocuous.
It’s the phrase we say when we want everything to stop. Stop the questions. Stop the noise. Stop the possibility of being seen too clearly.
“I’m fine” is the ultimate emotional full stop .It doesn’t mean you’re okay. It means you’re coping. Performing. Managing just enough not to fall apart in public. And the hardest part? Sometimes, you don’t even know you’re doing it
You know something needs to change. So, why haven’t you moved?
The and.experience where leadership really happens.
You already know the problem.
You are stuck. Not because you are failing. Not because you are incapable.
But because you are doing the same thing and expecting something different.
You are making decisions, but they take too long.
You are running meetings, but they are filled with noise.
You are leading, but you are still reacting instead of directing.
You are working harder, but it is not getting easier.
Leadership is happening to you, instead of you actually leading.
It is not because you need more time, more strategies, or more confidence.
It is because you have been taught that leadership is something you learn instead of something you do.
Time management is boll&cks
Leadership and Leadershit of time
Time is one of the most misunderstood leadership tools.
Why We Need to Talk About Time
We waste it, stretch it, hoard it, and pretend we have more of it than we do. We use it as an excuse for not making decisions. We let it be taken from us without question.
We optimise, we schedule, we squeeze every gap—yet somehow, we still feel like we don’t have enough.
What’s in a name?
We are called and.
Its a simple reason why..
Its a great coaching question and creates intentional pause.
Its always with not more, a necessity in todays day of more more more.
It says what we do, we help you add and.
We wanted a word that connected you to your leadership dna .
No one size fits all and is all encompassing.
Your name, your story, your power.
A name is never just a name. It’s a decision, a definition, a mark.
It’s given to us before we even understand who we are. Our parents choose it, maybe because it carries meaning, maybe because it sounds right, maybe because it belongs to someone they once knew. And from the moment it is spoken, it becomes something more.
A name shapes how the world sees us. It’s how we introduce ourselves, how we sign our stories, how people call us when they need us. A name can make you feel seen, or it can make you shrink.
Think about it. Have you ever met someone with the same name as an old bully from school, and suddenly, you feel something? A name carries memory. It carries weight.
Maybe you’ve changed your name, reshaped it, shortened it, or reclaimed it. Because names have power, and sometimes, the one we were given does not fit who we are becoming.
And it’s not just personal.
In business, a name can be the difference between being remembered and being forgotten. It can make people stop and ask questions or pas
The Power of a Chicken Call
Lessons from Sir Clive Woodward
I smiled and shared something I've come to live by—what I call the chicken call principle.
The concept is straightforward: just pick up the phone, take action, and make the call, even if it scares you. After all, what's the worst that could happen? They say no? The world keeps turning, but you've made progress because you did something.
The Chicken Call
I decided to implement this principle in the most daring way possible.
I picked up the phone and called Sir Clive Woodward, who led England to victory in the 2003 Rugby World Cup. Yes, I called him out of the blue. Why?
Leaky Language…..
Your words shape your leadership more than you realize. The way you speak can inspire, connect, and motivate—or it can lead to frustration, confusion, and missed opportunities. Take this quiz to discover if you're leading with clarity or stuck in leadershit.
Read more…
we’ve been writing blogs for years and have oodles of them on our sister company Coach to Coach